Akamaro ko kurya umuneke mbere yo gukora imibonano

Hari ibintu binyuranye uba usabwa kureka mbere yo gukora imibonano nkuko hari n’ibyo uba usabwa gukora. Impamvu ni uko ari igikorwa kiba gikeneye gutuza, ingufu,ibysihimo, ubusabane, kandi kikaba igikorwa kiba hagati y’abantu babiri. Hari amafunguro usabwa kwirinda hakaba n’ayo usabwa kwitaho. Muri yo uyu munsi tugiye kuvuga ku muneke.

Ese kuki usabwa kurya umuneke?

  1. Mbere ya byose mu mineke dusangamo bromelain iki kikaba ikinyabutabire tunsanga mu nanasi. Iyi bromelain ikaba izwiho kurwanya ibibazo byo kudashyukwa ndetse ikanafasha igitsina kugumana umurego no mu gikorwa hagati. Uretse ku bagabo no ku bagore ni ngombwa kurya umuneke mbere yo gukora imibonano kugirango bibafashe muri icyo gikorwa. Abagore iyi bromelain ituma rugongo yabo, umwe mu myanya ibafasha gushyukwa igeramo amaraso ahagije nuko ubushake bukiyongera
  2. Bwa kabiri, umuneke ni isoko ya potasiyumu na vitamin B2. Ibi bifatanyiriza hamwe mu gutuma umubiri ugira ingufu mu gikorwa cyose. Imibonano mpuzabitsina ni igikorwa gisaba kuba ufite ingufu, haba ku bagabo no ku bagore.
  3. Bwa gatatu, mu mineke habonekamo tryptophan cyangwa umusemburo w’ibyishimo. Bamwe mbere y’igikorwa usanga badatuje ndetse ugasanga bahangayitse kubera ibyo bagiye gukora. Kurya umuneke bizagufasha gutuza no kunezezwa n’igikorwa ugiyemo.
  4. Bwa kane imineke ikungahaye ku myunyungugu ibiri ari yo manganese na magnesium. Iyi myunyungugu ikaba ifasha porositate gukora neza nuko bigatuma ku mugabo igikorwa kigenda neza kuko iyi mvubura igira uruhare runini mu ikorwa ry’amasohoro
  5. Bwa nyuma umuneke ni isoko y’amasukari anyuranye kandi y’umwimerere. Iyo havuzwe isukari mu mubiri haba hanavuzwe ingufu. Rero aya masukari afatanya na ya vitamini B na potasiyumu mu kongera ingufu


Usabwa kurya umuneke byibuze habura isaha ngo winjire mu gikorwa, kandi si ngombwa myinshi, kuko umuneke umwe munini urahagije kugukorera umuti, nkuko mu mvugo z’ubu bivugwa.

Gusomana: Akamaro kabyo ku buzima

Nubwo bamwe bacyeka ko gusomana ari umuco mvamahanga, ariko iyo uganiriye n’abakuze bakwemeza ko na kera gusomana byahozeho gusa babyubahaga cyane nk’uko bubahaga gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina. Bitandukanye n’ubu usanga dusomanira no ku ka rubanda, abahisi n’abagenzi batureba.

Inyandiko zimwe zivuga ko gusomana utari umuco w’abantu ahubwo babikopeye inuma dore ko kera bari bazi yuko zo zimanyiriza mu kanwa kuko zikunda gusomana cyane.

Uretse kuba kimwe mu bikorwa byo gutegura imibonano no kwerekana urugwiro n’urukundo abahanga bugaragaza ko gusomana bafite ibindi bimarira umubiri nkuko iyi nkuru yacu igiye kubisobanura

1. Bizamura umusemburo w’ibyishimo

Iyo usomanye ubwonko buhita bukora uruvange rw’imisemburo inyuranye irimo oxytocin, dopamine na serotonin iyi ikaba ifatanyiriza hamwe mu gutuma ugira ibyishimo n’akanyamuneza. Si ibyo gusa kuko binamanura igipimo cya cortisol uyu ukaba umusemburo wa stress.

2. Byongera ubusabane

Uriya musemburo wa oxytocin kandi ni ingenzi kuko utuma hahora ubusabane hagati y’abantu babiri basomanye. Niyo mpamvu hagati y’abashakanye gusomana ari kimwe mu bibongerera gusabana

3. Bivura stress

Nkuko hejuru twabibonye, gusomana bituma igipimo cya cortisol mu mubiri kigabanyuka. Ibi rero bituma stress wari ufite, agahinda n’umubabaro bigabanyuka. Niyo mpamvu usanga iyo umuntu musomanye yari ababaye agahinda kagabanyuka

4. Bigabanya umuvuduko ukabije w’amaraso

Aha byumvikane neza uyu si umuti usimbura iyo usanzwe ufata ivura umuvuduko w’amaraso. Gusa gusomana bituma imiyoboro y’amaraso ibasha kwaguka nuko umuvuduko amaraso yagenderagaho ukagabanyuka kuko inzira anyuramo yabashije kwaguka. Muri macye gusomana ni byiza ku mutima

5. Bigabanya kuribwa mu mihango

Iyo uri mu mihango usanga imikaya yo mu kiziba cy’inda igeraho ikubabaza, ukumva umeze nk’aho ari ibinya byagufashemo. Gusomana bituma iyi mikaya ibasha koroha bwa buribwe bukagabanyuka

6. Bikiza umutwe

Niba wajyaga witwaza ko uri kubabara umutwe bigatuma udashaka gukora imibonano, uyu muti ni mwiza. Gusomana bituma imitsi ifunguka nuko umuvuduko w’amaraso ukagabanyuka maze stress ikagabanyuka ibi byose bikuvura umutwe.

7. Byongerera ingufu ubudahangarwa

Usanga benshi bavuga yuko mu kanwa haba mikorobi mbi nyinshi nyamara birengagiza yuko habamo n’inziza ari nazo nyinshi kuko zitabaye nyinshi twajya duhora turwaye mu kanwa. Iyo musomana rero muhererekanya izi mikorobi nziza (gusa iyo mutisukuye bihagije n’imbi ziziramo) nuko bigatuma uwari afite nkeya ziyongera bityo bikamwongerera ubudahangarwa bwo mu kanwa

8. Birwanya gucukuka amenyo

Iyo usomana bituma amacandwe umubiri ukora yiyongera. Amacandwe atuma mu kanwa hahora ubuhehere, ubasha kumira neza kandi atuma nta biryo byinshi bifata ku menyo. Ibi byose bituma amenyo atarwaragurika

9. Buriya ngo ni ikimenyetso cy’inshuti nyayo

Abahanga bemeza yuko umuntu uko agusomye bwa mbere, ni ukuvuga mugitangira inzira y’urukundo bikwereka niba agufitiye urukundo nyarwo cyangwa ari amarangamutima ashira vuba. Iyo agusomye n’ubwitonzi, atabihubukiye, nta gahato, biba byerekana ko akwiyumvamo. Naho iyo abikora nk’ucuranwa kandi atitaye aho muri akenshi biba ari iby’ako kanya kubera ikintu runaka agushakaho

10. Ni byiza mu gutegura imibonano

Usanga benshi bavuga yuko utemeye ko musomana no gukora imibonano mwabyihorera. Nibyo koko gusomana ni kimwe mu bikorwa by’ingenzi byo gutegura imibonano kandi iyo bikozwe neza bituma mwese mubikora mubikunze.
Ku bagabo bagorwa n’inshuro ya kabiri, ubushakashatsi bugaragaza ko gusomana bibafasha kongera gufata umurego bitagoranye cyane kandi iyo utinda kurangiza ugasomana uri mu gikorwa hagati byihutisha kurangiza.

Dusoza

Reka dusoze tuvuga ko gusomana Nubwo ari byiza kandi ari ingenzi ariko bisaba isuku yo mu kanwa ku mpande zombi. Ikindi bishobora gukwirakwiza indwara nka Ebola ndetse n’izindi zigendera mu mwuka nk’igituntu na Covid19.

Biba bibabaje iyo ugiye gusoma umuntu ugasanga mu kanwa ke haturukamo umwuka mubi. Niyo mpamvu mu gihe uteganya gukora iki gikorwa usabwa koza mu kanwa ndetse niba wanyoye inzoga cyangwa itabi ugashaka utuntu two guhumuza mu kanwa. Ushobora guhekenya pome, guhekenya orbit (itarimo isukari) cyangwa ugafata ikindi cyagabanya uwo mwuka mu kanwa.

Abafite abo basomana , MURYOHERWE

Ibimenyetso 7 bizakwereka ko agukunda bya nyabyo

Ni ibintu bitoroshye kuba wamenya niba umuntu runaka agukunda koko. Kumenya niba amarangamutima akugaragariza koko ashingiye ku rukundo, bijya bigora. Icyakora nanone hari uwaririmbye ati “Umutima ukunda ntiwihishira, n’iyo nyirawo yifashe urukundo ruramutamaza”.
Hano twagukusanyirije ibintu birindwi twakita simusiga, byo washingiraho umenya ko umuntu mu by’ukuri agukunda.

1. Indoro ye irabyerekana

Ikimenyetso cya mbere kizakwereka umuntu wagukunze ni uburyo akurebamo iyo muri kumwe. Ushobora kuba utajyaga ubyitaho, cyangwa se utari ubizi ariko indoro y’umuntu ugukunda, ukwishimira iyo muri kumwe iba itandukanye n’isanzwe areba abandi. Mu mvugo y’ubu bavuga ko aba areba icyoroshye. Mbese iyo akureba wagirango aba areba malayika imbere ye, aba akubona nk’impano ye iturutse mu ijuru

2. Akugira nyambere

Umuntu ugukunda akubonera umwanya. Akibyuka ni wowe yumva agomba kubanza kubwira amakuru akanayakubaza, afashe urugendo arakumenyesha, icyiza abonye, ikibi kimubayeho ni wowe yihutira kumenyesha. Usanga uzi byinshi bye no kurenza abo babana cyangwa umuryango we, kuko abona ko uri uw’agaciro mu buzima bwe.

3. Akwakira uko uri

Ni kenshi mu rukundo bamwe baba bumva abo bakunda bahinduka uko bashaka. Ugukunda bya nyabyo azagukunda kandi akwakire uko uri kuko mbere yuko agukunda yabanje kukumenya, abona ko imico yawe, imyitwarire, ibyo ukunda n’ibyo wanga azabasha kubyubahiriza no kubyakira. Niba akumenye unywa ugasinda (nubwo atari ibyo gushyigikira), ntana rimwe uzabona abiguhora, icyakora ntibizamubuza kuguha inama. Uko wakambara kose, uko wasokoza kose, muri macye akunda wowe, nta kindi ashingiyeho.

4. Aguhana akubaka

Umugani nyarwanda uravuga ngo “Inyama itari iyawe ntuyirinda ibyiyoni”. Umuntu ugukunda nta na rimwe azishimira cyangwa azashyigikira amafuti yawe. Ntabwo “avugira Mivumbi kumuvumba”, ikosa ryose uzakora, azaguhana kandi akwereke inzira nziza wakanyuzemo bikagenda neza. Ntabwo azakubonaho ikosa ngo ajye kubibwira abandi, azabibwira wowe nyirubwite ndetse anaguhane ati uramenye ntuzongere ntibigukwiriye

5. Ashyigikira imishinga yawe

Ntawe ubaho atagira ibyo yifuza kugeraho mu buzima. Ugukunda rero azagutera inkunga yose afite yaba inkunga y’ibitekerezo cyangwa y’ubushobozi niba abufite, muri gahunda zawe z’iterambere. Azagushyigikira kandi anakugire inama zubaka. Azakuba hafi muri byose na hose.

6. No mu bihe bigoye, aba ahari

Mumaze gutongana none ugize ikibazo gitunguranye? Ntabwo azita ku burakari afite azahita atabara. Umukeneye ahantu bimugoye kugera kubera akazi afite cyangwa indi mpamvu? Azakugeraho nubwo bigoye. Muri macye aritanga ku bwawe, kuko ibyawe aba abona ari byo bye. No mu tuntu duto, hamwe wacyekaga ko ataboneka, azakuba hafi.

7. Akwinjiza mu buzima bwe

Niba agukunda koko by’ukuri nta na kimwe cyo mu buzima bwe azagukinga cyangwa ngo akiguhishe. Ibye byose azabikwinjizamo. Ntazaguhisha umuryango we, nta na rimwe azatinya kukwereka inshuti ze, imishinga afite, ako akora, ibyo ari guteganya, muri macye azagusangiza ubuzima bwe bwose.
Ese ufite umuntu nk’uwo? ARAGUKUNDA.

Uyu musore aragukunda ariko bitari ibyo kubana: Sobanukirwa

Ni kenshi uzasanga umusore n’inkumi bajya mu rukundo, ariko ugategereza ko batanga ubutumire bw’ubukwe ugaheba. Umukobwa na we akaba ashobora guhakanira abandi basore yizeye ko uwo musore azagera aho akavuga ijambo ariko agaheba.
Kimwe mu bishobora kubitera harimo kuba umusore akubonamo inshuti ariko atagufata nk’uwo bazubakana urugo. Gusa ntibivuze ko akunenga ahubwo ni uko ubushuti hagati y’umusore n’inkumi atari ihame ngo buri gihe buganishe ku kubana. Hano twakusanyije bimwe mu bimenyetso byakwereka umusore utagukundira kuzabana

1. Ntacyo atinya kukubwira niyo yaba amafuti

Ubusanzwe hari abantu umusore aganirira byose. Aba mbere ni ababyeyi cyangwa abavandimwe, abandi ni abasore bagenzi be b’inshuti magara. Niba umusore ubona mukundana nta na kimwe aguhisha, akubwira buri kimwe cyose, ataguhisha uwo baryamanye, na bimwe wumvaga atakakubwiye, ni uko agukunda bitagamije kubana

2. Akubwira ko uri mwiza. Akarekera aho

Umusore ugukunda iyo akubwiye ko uri mwiza agerekaho andi magambo meza, imitoma igutaka, mbese ag
kagushyomagiza hamwe wumva uri umwamikazi imbere ye. Nyamara niba mwaganiraga ukumva arakubwiye ati uri mwiza. Ntagire icyo arenzaho, ni uko agufata nk’inshuti magara gusa, nta birenze

3. Musohokana kenshi ariko ntagutereta

Niyo mwajyana ku mazi, niyo mwasohokana mu kabyiniro yewe niyo mwararana, ntuzigera wumva avuga amagambo agamije gutereta. Muzaganira, museke, mwishime, mushobora no kuryamana rwose si igitangaza ariko rwose ijambo ryerekana ko yifuza ko wazamubera mutima w’urugo ntuzigera urimwumvana.

4. Niyo muryamanye, abikora nk’uwikinira

Twari tubivuzeho hejuru. Uyu musore, mushobora gusohokana bukanabiriraho bikaba ngombwa ko urara iwe cyangwa se mufata icyumba cyo kuraramo. Nagusaba ko mukora imibonano, igisubizo cyose uzamuha ntazabitindaho. Nuhakana azahita yiryamira yisinzirire, nubyemera azabikora, nimurangiza yiryamire, mbese kuri we kuba bibayeho si uko mukundana ahubwo ni uko bibaye ngombwa gusa.

5. Ntagufuhira

Kuba yagusangana n’undi musore, kuba se yareka mugenzi we muziranye akaba yagusohokana, wamusura se, ni ikindi kikwereka yuko agufata nk’inshuti gusa ariko bitari ibigamije kubana.

6. Akubwira uwo yihebeye


Nubwo wowe uzabyumva wenda ukababara ariko we aba agufata ahari nk’umusore mugenzi we, ku buryo azabikubwira ndetse akaba yanakugisha inama. Uyu musore abikora nta kibazo afite ku mutima kuko ubushuti bwanyu we aba abufata nk’ubusanzwe. Ntabwo azatinya kukwereka uwo yihebeye, ndetse ashobora no kubahuza ngo mumenyane birenze.

7. Akubwira ko uri inshuti nziza

Nubwo bimeze bityo ariko ntazahwema kukurata akubwira ukuntu uri inshuti nziza, uri umunyamabanga we, uri mushiki we, mbese uri byose bye. Mbese ntazatinya kukwita umujama mu mvugo y’ab’ubu.
Niba umusore mukundana ari uko bimeze, ashobora kuba agukunda ariko ataguteganya ho kumubera umugore.

Bimwe mu byatuma urukundo rwanyu rurushaho kuramba



Mu nkuru tumaze igihe dukora twibanze ku mibanire. Ibi ntibyapfuye kwizana, ahubwo ni uko muri iyi minsi benshi bari kumarana amasaha yose y’umunsi n’abo bashakanye, ibitabagaho mu minsi y’akazi isanzwe mbere yuko gahunda ya guma mu rugo itangira. Ibi rero bishobora gutera bamwe kongera gusana umubano wari warajemo agatotsi nubwo bitanabuza ko kuri bamwe noneho birushaho kuzamba dore abagore bashobora kwinubira imibonano ya buri kanya, abagabo bakamenya byinshi bibera mu ngo badahari, n’ibindi binyuranye.
Mu nkuru imwe twari twavuze ku nkingi za mwamba zakubaka umubano, noneho muri iyi tugiye kurebera hamwe ibyo wagakwiye gukora kugirango umubano wanyu ubashe kuramba igihe kirekire.

1. Ntuzasuzugure na rimwe uwo mwashakanye

Iyi ngingo iri mu ngingo zikomeye mu rugo. Gusuzugura uwo mwashakanye ntabwo ari mu mvugo n’ingiro gusa ahubwo no kutamwubaha cyangwa ngo umwubahishe mu bandi ni ukumusuzugura. Niba ushaka ko urukundo ruramba, mwubahe umwubahishe. Menya ibyo akunda ubimukorere ibyo yanga ubyirinde. Nubwo nudashobora guhuza imyumvire 100% ariko byibuze, mwubahe

2. Ubufatanye

Nibyo nubundi uwo mwashakanye ni umufasha muri byose. Agukeneyeho ubufasha nk’uko nawe ubumukeneyeho. Uko gukenerana bituma murushaho gufatanya no kuba isanga n’ingoyi hagati yanyu.

3. Emera intege nke ze

Nta mwere wabona mu mubano ahubwo buri wese agira aho agera agacika intege agakosa. Ibi ntibizatume wumva wamucikaho, ahubwo rushaho kumufasha kubisohokamo no kubireka, mu rukundo n’ubupfura. Umuntu muzamarana ubuzima busigaye usabwa kumwakira uko ari

4. Menya gushimira no mu tuntu duto

Niba umugore atetse ukumva byaryoshye, kumushima ni ngombwa. Niba umugabo yibutse gutahana imbuto z’abana nubwo ari inshingano ze ariko mushimire. Ni byinshi washimira, kandi uwawe azabiha agaciro, ntabwo gushima bigarukira ku mpano nini uhawe cyangwa se igikorwa kinini ukorewe

5. Wigerageza kumuhindura

Rimwe mu makosa akomeye akorwa mu rukundo harimo kugerageza guhindura uwo mukundana/mwashakanye ngo abe uko wifuza/ushaka. Ibi biragoye ahubwo umuntu ubwe yahinduka ku bwe, mu gihe abona ko bibangamye, uko yitwaraga cyangwa ibyo yakoraga. Ndetse ahinduka mu gihe we yumva ko agomba guhinduka cyangwa yiteguye guhinduka

6. Marana igihe kinini na we

Yego uri mu kazi, cyangwa ufite ibindi bitwara umwanya ariko nanone mu gihe cyose bishoboka, fata akanya kanini ukamarane n’umukunzi/umufasha wawe, muganire, museke, mukine, mbese umuhe umwanya uhagije wo kubana na we. Ibi ni ingenzi mu mubano wanyu

7. Reka ibyahise

Mu hahise, niyo haba ejo, ibyabaye byarabaye. Niba ari amakosa yagukoreye kandi akaba yarayasabiye imbabazi, ni byiza ko utayagarura uyu munsi kuko aho gukemura ikibazo birushaho kukiremereza. Incyuro ntacyo zungura mu rukundo

8. Mwizere

Uwizera umwana w’umuntu avumwe, niko muri Bibiliya handitse. Ariko se wibukako urukundo bivuze kwizera? Iyo bigeze mu rukundo, ihame rya mbere ni ukwizera, kuko umuntu utareba mu mutima, mudafite icyo mupfana, muhuzwa n’urukundo gusa, hatajemo kwizerana ntacyo mwazageraho.

9. Mufungukire

Niba hari icyakubabaje, ikikubangamiye, icyo utishimiye, wimuhisha. Niba kandi hari ikikunejeje, icyo wishimiye mubwire musangire uwo munezero. Mu ijambo rimwe, WIBYIHERERANA

10. Ibuka ibihe bya ngombwa

Kuba utibuka itariki y’amavuko y’umukunzi, utibuka igihe mwahuye bwa mbere, umunsi mwafatiye gahunda runaka, si byiza. Gerageza kugira amatariki y’ingenzi wibuka, ujye unanyuzamo ube wamutunguza impano ku itariki runaka, wenda we atanibuka, nk’itariki yaboneyeho perimi, itariki yabatirijweho, itariki yaboneyeho dipolome…

11. Wimwima amahirwe yandi

Uwo ukunda nakosa, uzamubabarire. Ashobora kuzongera agakosa, ku buryo uzagera aho ukumva ararambiwe. Aho wumva ugiye kurambirwa, niho akeneye imbabazi zawe no kumwereka ko ubabajwe n’ikosa rye, ariko ukimukunda. Ibi bizatuma arushaho kubona ko nubwo akosa ariko umukunda, bimuhe imbaraga zo kwikosora

12. Guma mu masezerano

Amasezerano avugwa aha si yayandi wasezeranye imbere y’Imana n’abantu gusa ahubwo haniyongeraho andi yose ugenda umuha. Ibyo uzamukorera, ibyo wiyemeje kureka, imishinga umufitiye, mbese icyo wamwemereye cyose gikomereho. Bituma abona ko uri umuntu nyawe, kandi ko kubana nawe atibeshye.
Gutuma urukundo ruramba si ibintu uzakora umwanya umwe gusa ngo bihite biba, ahubwo bigusaba kugenda ubiha igihe, ubyiyemeza unabyimenyereza kugera igihe uzagenda ubona ko biri mu nzira nziza, uzakomereze aho.

Inkingi za mwamba mu gukomeza umubano

Imibanire hagati y’abantu ni ikintu cy’ingenzi ndetse cy’agaciro kuruta ibindi. Haba hagati y’ababyeyi n’abana, hagati y’abavukana, inshuti cyangwa ababana, umubano uba ukwiye gushyirwamo ibituma urushaho kuba mwiza, kandi ukaba nta makemwa.
Hano twakusanyije inkingi za mwamba umubano ukwiye kubakiraho ngo ube ukomeye.

1. Icyizere

Kwizera ni cyo kintu cya mbere gituma umubano uryoha kandi ugashimisha. Niba utizera uwawe, ugashidikanya ku byo akubwira cyangwa akora, uwo mubano ntabwo wazaramba. Nubwo ashobora gukora ibituma icyizere wari ufite kigabanyuka cyangwa kigashira, niba wemeye gukomezanya na we, ni byiza kongera kumugirira icyizere, nubwo utabura kugira amakenga, ariko kumwereka ko utamwizeye ukaba wanagera aho ubimubwira, rwose ntabwo byatuma umubano uramba.

2. Kubaha

Ni ihame mu muryango uwo ari wo wose ko abantu bubahana. Nubwo kenshi twumva ko abana bubaha abakuru, abagore bakubaha abagabo, ariko kubaha ni inshingano za buri wese muri buri mubano. Ibi bituma buri wese amenya uruhare rwe, umupaka we, ibyo yemerewe n’ibyo ashinzwe kandi undi akabimwubahira. Uvuze ko umuntu mubanye neza ariko utamwubaha waba ubeshye. Kubaha kandi nta mupaka bigira

3. Urukundo

Nubwo tutarugize urwa mbere, ni uko n’ubusanzwe umubano nyawo uba wubakiye ku rukundo. Iyo hari urukundo hazamo kubahana, iyo hari urukundo hazamo kwizerana. Urukundo rutera kubabarira ikosa ryose, kandi rutera kwicuza no gusaba imbabazi igihe cyose wakoze nabi. Rukurinda byinshi, rugutegeka byinshi.

4. Gutega amatwi no gutuza

Igihe iwo mwashakanye, uwo mukundana se ari kuvuga, si byiza kumujambuza, kumuca mu ijambo. Ahubwo tuza, utege amatwi, uze kuvuga ibyawe nyuma. Uko ubyumva, ubishyiraho umaze kumva neza, ntabwo ubivuga mu ijambo hagati, kuko ntuba uzi ubusobanuro buri bukurikireho. Niyo waba umubyeyi, igihe umwana ari kukubwira, ni byiza kumutega amatwi, bituma amenya agaciro ko gutuza no gutega amatwi

5. Itumanaho

Guhana amakuru, neza kandi ku gihe ni ngombwa mu mubano uwo ari wo wose. Usanga abakundana cyangwa abashakanye iyo bagiranye akabazo cyangwa barakaranyije bahita baceceka, itumanaho rikagabanyuka. Ndetse bamwe bagaragaza ibyababangamiye, mu gihe gusa hagize akabazo kavuka. Ibi rero ni bibi kuko no mu gihe mwarakaranyije, gukomeza kuvugana ni kimwe mu bibafasha kongera gusubukura umubano neza. Niba usanzwe uvuga aho ugiye, ibyo ugiyemo cyangwa icyo bagutegurira, bikore. Ni ngombwa mu gutsura umubano mwiza
Nubwo urukundo ari ryo shingiro rya buri mubano ariko rwonyine ntirwabyishoboza. Rukenera izindi nkingi tuvuze haruguru. Mu gihe mwizerana, mwubahana, mukundana, mutegana amatwi ndetse mugahana amakuru ku gihe, bizatuma imibanire yanyu ikomeza kuba nta makemwa.

Bimwe mu byakwereka umugabo ukikwishimira



Umaze igihe ushyingiwe none uribaza niba koko umugabo wawe akikunezererwa. Ubaza bagenzi bawe ibyo abagabo babo babakorera ngo babereke ko babakunda, ndetse nawe ntako utagira ngo ubashe kumenya niba koko uwo washatse akwishimira.
Wikomeza kuvunika burya umugabo wishimiye urushako kandi akanezererwa umugore we hari ibimuranga, nibyo tugiye kuva imuzingo.

1. Kugusoma

Iyo avuye cyangwa agiye ku kazi ntiyibagirwa kugusoma. Si ukugusoma bya nikize, ahubwo arakwegera akaguhobera nuko akagusoma ku munwa. Iki ni ikikwereka ko niba agiye ari wowe azirikana kandi niba agarutse yishimiye kuza iruhande rwawe kuko umurutira byose.

2. Arakuzirikana

Iyo agiye kure y’urugo mu kazi cyangwa isafari nkuko bamwe babyita, ahora aguha amakuru kandi akubaza ayawe. Umugabo wishimiye urugo akumbura umugore we iyo batari kumwe. Kuri ubu biroroshye ho hanaje uburyo bw’itumanaho bunyuranye zaba za WhatsApp, Messenger, n’ubundi buryo bunyuranye bw’itumanaho yakoresha ariko akakugezaho amakuru akanamenya ayawe.
Kuri terefoni aba akubwira amagambo y’iremamutima kandi y’urukundo

3. Za “Ndagukunda”

Umugabo wishimiye urugo ahora akubwira ko agukunda. Uyu si wa mugabo uzabanza kwibutsa kubikubwira cyangwa ngo ubanze ubimubaze. Hari uwo ubaza uti “Ese urankunda?” nuko akagusubiza ati Iyo ntagukunda simba naragushatse, umunsi nzaba ntakigukunda rero nzabikubwira”
Umugabo ugukunda kandi ukwishimira ntabwo ateye atyo. Akubwira ko agukunda bimuvuye ku mutima kandi anezezwa nuko nawe umusubiza ko umukunda. Inshuro zose yabivuga ku munsi cyangwa akabikwandikira, biba bimurimo.

4. Ni umufasha

Nibyo koko umugabo nubwo ari we mutware w’urugo nyamara umugabo ugukunda azagufasha mu byo ukora. Azabera abana icyitegererezo kandi azagufasha kubarera ngo bazabemo nabo abagabo n’abagore bizihiye ingo zabo. Nta kazi atagufasha igihe cyose afite akanya.
Azagufasha guteka, guhanagura inkweto, gutunganya ubusitani, guhambura ibisuko, guca inzara, kugaburira umwana, n’ibindi binyuranye. Kandi abikore abyibwirije anabyishimiye.

5. Aragucyeza

Iri jambo ahari ni ikinyarwanda cyimbitse, ariko umugabo ugukunda azagushima anagushimire ibyo wakoze cyangwa wagezeho. Niba washokoje neza niwe uzabikubwira bwa mbere, nuteka neza azabikubwira, azahora akubwira ukuntu uri mwiza, ukuntu mu buriri umushimisha,…
Muri macye ya mvugo ngo urukundo ni impumyi izamusohoreraho kuko azaba abona ibyiza byawe gusa.

6. Arahumuriza

Iyo ubabaye akuba hafi, akaguhumuriza akaguhoza. Iyo intimba n’ishavu bibaye byinshi akora uko ashoboye ukongera kugarura inseko n’ibyishimo. Nubwo atari umuhanga mu gufasha abahungabanye nyamara urukundo agukunda rutuma akora iyo bwabaga ngo wongere ucye ku maso.

7. Ntaguhisha

Umugabo ugukunda akubwira ibyamubangamiye, ibyo yifuza kugeraho, ibyo yagezeho. Akubwira ikosa yagukoreye kandi akarisabira imbabazi. Aba ameze nk’umwana wawe, aguha agaciro kandi akakubitsa ibanga nk’uko yaribitsaga nyina bakibana. Uretse kuba uri umugore we aba anagufata nk’umunyamabanga we, kandi arakwizera akakubwira.

Dusoza

Mugabo usomye ibi niba hari ibyo utakoraga ni cyo gihe ngo ubikore maze urusheho kwereka umugore wawe ko wamushatse umukunda kandi ukimukunda. Mugore usomye ibi ugasanga uwawe ntabikora byose ntibivuze ko atagukunda ahubwo genzura urebe ibyo akora bindi tutavuzemo hano kandi unasuzume niba nta ruhare ufite mu kuba utabikorerwa.
Buri wese nashyira mugenzi we ku mwanya w’imbere muzaba mu ngo zishimye kandi muzaba abahamya b’uko urukundo nyarwo rukiriho, ko no mu bihe bikomeye rudashira.

Bimwe mu byabangamira umubano wanyu n’uko mwabikosora

Mu mibanire ya buri munsi haba ku bashakanye cyangwa se abakundana, siko buri gihe ibintu bihora bimeze neza. Habaho igihe ibintu bigenda nabi, kubera impamvu imwe cya nwa nyinshi, nyamara umwanzuro si ukwemerera ibyo bibazo guhungabanya umubano ahubwo icya ngombwa ni ukurebera hamwe uko ikibazo cyavutse cyakemuka
Muri iyi nkuru tugiye kurebera hamwe ibiza ku isonga mu gutera ibibazo mu mubano, ndetse n’uburyo bwagakoreshejwe mu kubikemura.

1. Intonganya

Ntabwo bizabaho ko ikintu cyose mucyumvikanaho, ahubwo rimwe na rimwe hazajya habaho kudahuza, ndetse bishoboke ko hanabaho kuvuga nabi no kurakaranya. Mushobora gupfa amafaranga, gutinda gutaha, gutinda guteka, n’ibindi mutumvikanyeho. Ibi kubyirinda hakiri kare ni ukwiha umurongo ubireba hakiri kare, gutanga amakuru ku gihe mu gihe hari impinduka ibaye wenda ku masaha usanzwe utahira, … Kandi igihe bibayeho mukaganira uwakosheje ntabe udakorwaho ahubwo agaca bugufi akemera ikosa, uwakosherejwe na we ntabigire intambara cyane, kuko amahane ntakemura ikibazo kurenza amahoro

2. Gutanga amakuru

Nkuko tumaze kubivuga hejuru, gutanga amakuru ku gihe, kubwirana uko umunsi wagenze, ibibazo wahuye na byo… Kimwe mu bituma uwo mwashakanye/mukundana akwibazaho akayoberwa ibyawe ni ukutamuvugisha, kutamuganiriza kuko ashobora no kubibonamo ko utakimukeneye cyangwa se amakuru utamuha hari undi usigaye uyaha. Ni byiza kuganira kuri buri kimwe kibareba, gutanga amakuru ku gihe, gusabana haba kuri terefoni, muri kumwe se, … Ikiruta byose umenye icyo ugomba kuvuga n’igihe ukivugamo

3. Guhemuka

Nubwo ushobora kubabarirwa nyuma yo guca inyuma uwo mwashakanye ariko biragoye kuba wakongera kugirirwa icyizere nka mbere. Ntabwo kenshi bibaho bitunguranye, nubwo bishoboka, ahubwo ni ibintu bitwara igihe, kubipanga byaba igihe n’ahantu bizabera. Niba wananiwe kubihisha ugafatwa, ca bugufi usabe imbabazi kandi ugaragaze guhinduka ku buryo bwose bushoboka. Gusa inama isumba izindi ni ukwirinda mu buryo bwose bushoboka kuba wahemukira uwo mwashakanye

4. Ihungabana

Iri ni ihungabana mu ntekererezo ariko ritaturutse ku wo mwashakanye/uwo mukundana. Ushobora kuba ubangamiwe ku kazi, kuba ufite ibibazo aho uvuka, kuba ufite ibibazo by’ubukungu, hamwe usanga byakurenze bikaza guhungabanya umubano wanyu.
Ibi kubyirinda ni ukutihererana ibibazo, kudahisha uwo mwashakanye/mukundana akabazo kose waba wahuye na ko kuko nubwo atagufasha ugacyemura ariko byibuze amenya uko iyo minsi akwitwaraho, amagambo akubwira, ayo yirinda…

5. Imibonano

Uwo mwashakanye ashobora kuba ahora yifuza imibonano mu gihe wowe umeze nk’aho wayizinutswe. Ushobora no kuba wowe wumva uyishaka rimwe mu cyumweru we ashaka byibuze buri munsi. Aha rero hatabayeho kubiganiraho hashobora kuzamo gushwana cyangwa se guhemukirana kandi iki ni ikibazo cyoroshye. Ku muntu mukundana, kwihanganirana no kumvikana biza ku isonga. Niba mudahuza ubushake, mushobora gushyiraho igihe cyo muzajya mubikoramo, iminsi n’amasaha. Bituma habaho guhuza, ndetse kuko muba muzi neza umunsi muzabikoreraho, mwembi mukitegura mu mutwe, ku buryo mu mubiri biri bworohe. Ihame ariko si uguhana igihe, mwanashaka ubundi buryo mwumvikana, ariko ntibihungabanye umubano wanyu

6. Ubutunzi

Byibuze buri joro, urugo rumwe mu ngo 10, bashwana bapfa imitungo. Ni umubare utari muto, buri munsi. Bivuze ko buri rugo byibuze rimwe mu buzima bagira igihe bapfa ibyerekeye imitungo. Umuti ni uwuhe? Ni byiza kuganira mweruye ku ikoreshwa ry’amafaranga. Niba hari ukora undi adakora, ntiyumve ko umutungo ari uwe awukoresha uko ashaka ahubwo ni uwo musangiye keretse mu gihe mwumvikanye ko buri wese yigenga ku mutungo we. Mu gihe bibashobokeye, mwumvikane umubare runaka buri umwe yemerewe gukoresha uko abyumva (gutembera, gusengera, kwidagadura, …) ariko munumvikane ku mikoreshereze yawo muri rusange. Ibi bizabarinda

7. Imiryango

Byaba kubafasha, ababasura bakahatinda se, abo mucumbikira biga, bashaka akazi se, ni bimwe mu bishobora kuzana agatotsi mu muryango. Nyamara nanone si ko byakagenze ahubwo byakabaye byiza mugiye mubiganiraho mugafatanya gufata umwanzuro. Si ihame ngo nimuha igihumbi hamwe n’abandi mukibahe, kuko siko banganyije kugikenera, ahubwo icyo gihumbi mwacyumvikanyeho cyangwa ubikoze kuko ari iwanyu, bene wanyu? Ese uwo munyeshuri wiga ataha aho, mbere yuko aza mwabiganiriyeho cyangwa waramubwiye uti wa murumuna wanjye azajya yiga aba hano, mbese nk’itangazo gusa? Kubiganiraho ni byo byiza kandi birafasha
Si ibi gusa nawe uzi ibindi bishobora kuba bikubangamira. Ni byiza kwicara mukabiganiraho, hatajemo kwikuza no kwikunda, ni bwo umubano wanyu uzarushaho kugenda neza mu buzima bwanyu bwa buri munsi.

Ibyagufasha mu gihe ufite ikibazo cyo kurangiza vuba

Ikibazo cyo kurangiza vuba ni ikibazo rusange nubwo kidakunze kuvugwa kenshi cyangwa cyane nyamara usanga abagabo bamwe bakigira ndetse bakakimarana igihe. Nubwo ku ruhande rumwe bishobora kukubaho kubera indwara runaka, imiti se ufata, ubuzima se ubayemo, ariko binashobora guturuka ku kuba hari intungamubiri runaka ubura cyangwa ufite nkeya mu mubiri
Muri iyi nkuru twagukusanyirije amafunguro amwe wakibandaho mu gihe ufite ikibazo cyo kurangiza vuba, gusa ntabwo bizakosora ikibazo ako kanya, ariko bigenda bigufasha buhoro buhoro.
Gusa ibi ntibikuraho kuba wakivuza cyane cyane igihe usanze ikibazo kidacyemutse.

1. Imbuto z’ibitunguru bya poirreau

Niba utari ubizi ariko ibi bitunguru bigira utubuto iyo byeze, utubuto tuba ari duto. Utu tubuto twifitemo ubushobozi bwo gufasha abagabo bafite ikibazo cyo kurangiza vuba. Icyo ukora usya utu tubuto, ukavanga mu mazi ukanywa, ukabikora mbere yo kurya. Ushobora kandi no kurya ibi bitunguru, ariko bibisi kuri salade, na byo byagufasha

2. Tangawizi n’ubuki

Tangawizi ituma amaraso abasha gutembera neza mu mubiri bityo yagera mu gitsina akahatinda kandi ni byo bifasha igitsina kugumana umurego. Ubuki na bwo ku ruhande rwabwo na bwo buzwiho gutera akanyabugabo. Niba ufite agafu ka tangawizi, fata agace k’akayiko gato uvange n’ikiyiko kinini cy’ubuki ubirye. Utabonye ifu, kora icyayi cya tangawizi noneho mu mwanya w’isukari ushyiremo ubuki. Bizagufasha. Jya ubikora buri gihe mbere yo kuryama

3. Tungurusumu

Nubwo benshi banga impumuro yayo, ariko tungurusumu na yo ifasha mu gutinda kurangiza. Ufata udutete twayo 4, ukaduhekenya buri gitondo nta kindi kintu urarya. Bituma amaraso abasha gutembera neza mu mubiri. Mu gihe udashaka kumva impumuro yayo, urye pome cyangwa ikindi gikunjagurika nyuma yo kuyihekenya

4. Karoti


Karoti na zo zizwiho gufasha abafite ikibazo cyo kurangiza vuba. Mu kuzikoresha, zikatagure uzitogose, nuzirya urenzeho igi ritogosheje n’ikiyiko cy’ubuki, buri munsi

5. Indyo iboneye

Uretse ibi tuvuze haruguru, unasabwa gufata indyo iboneye. Irinde ibinyobwa birimo caffeine kuko burya ntacyo byagufasha kinini. Irinde za shokola mu moko yazo yose. Ahubwo ibande ku bikungahaye kuri zinc, selenium na calcium n’ubutare kuko byongerera umubiri ingufu. Aha twavugamo ubunyobwa, inzuzi z’ibihaza, amata y’inshyushyu, poivron, umufa w’inyama cyane cyane inkoko n’inka, sezame n’utundi tubuto tunyuranye

Wari uzi ko burya gukundana no kubana bitandukanye?

Iyo umusore abwiye umukobwa ko amukunda, ese aba asobanuye ko ashaka ko bazabana? Ese iyo amubwiye ko ashaka ko bazabana biba bisobanuye ko amukunda?
Iri hurizo benshi ntitujya dufata umwanya wokurikora ariko kandi kuryitaho, kurikora ni bimwe mu byafasha abagiye kubana cyangwa se ababana kuko byarinda byinshi hagati yacu, harimo za gatanya, intonganya n’ibindi bitari byiza biba mu ngo.

URUKUNDO

Ikiremwamuntu aho kiva kikagera cyishimira gukundwa, kandi n’amadini yose ni cyo kintu cya mbere yigisha. Urukundo. Nubwo rimwe na rimwe dukunda kuruha ibyiciro aho tuzanamo urukundo rwa kivandimwe, urukundo rwa kibyeyi n’ibindi ariko burya tuba turi gushaka kubikomeza, urukundo ni urukundo. Iyo bigeze ku byiciro ntibiba bikiri urukundo byahabwa indi nyito aho bishobora kuba impuhwe, ubugwaneza, ubuvandimwe n’ibindi.
Dukunda kurya, dukunda imikino runaka, dukunda abantu, dukunda akazi, dukunda kuryama… ni byinshi dusobanura dukoresheje inshinga gukunda.
Urukundo ni amahitamo ugirira ikintu/umuntu runaka bitewe n’uko wumva bikujemo utanazi impamvu nubwo rimwe na rimwe ishobora kubaho nk’imiterere, imikorere n’ibindi. Ubajije umubyeyi ufite abana batanu niba bose abakunda kimwe, yagusubiza ko abakunda kimwe ariko ufashe umwaka wose ugenzura ibyo akorera ba bana be, niho wamenya ko burya yibeshyaga. Dukunda kubera amahitamo, ntabwo ari ibintu byizana gusa. Ibyizana gusa ni amarangamutima, kandi na yo agira ikiyabyutsa, cyashira agashira.
Nkunda uko ugenda, uko uteka, uko uryoshya mu buriri, uko wambara,… Byose ni urukundo.
Gusa iyo havuzwe urukundo hagati y’abantu babiri batandukanye, urukundo warushyira mu bice bibiri gusa.
Igice cya mbere ni urukundo rutaganisha ku mibonano mpuzabitsina. Uru rukundo ruba hagati y’abavandimwe, ababyeyi n’abana, abasore ukwabo n’inkumi ukwazo, cyangwa hagati y’abadahuje ibitsina ariko batanagamije kuryamana. Niho uzasanga ufite umugabo mukundana kuko akugira inama, agutabara byakomeye, kandi uri umugore wubatse. Cyangwa se akaba ari umugore mwikundanira, musurana, musangira nyamara uwawe ari mu rugo.
Ikindi gice ni urukundo ariko ruganisha ku mibonano mpuzabitsina. Akenshi tuba twumva rwakabaye hagati y’abashakanye gusa ariko unasanga ruba hagati y’umusore n’inkumi, hagati y’umugore n’umugabo w’abandi, mbese ku buryo biramutse bibayeho ko ya mibonano itabaho, na rwo rwajya mu marembera. Benshi tubyita irari ariko ku rundi ruhande biratandukanye kuko bisaba ko mwembi mubyemeranyaho. Irari kandi ni bwite nshobora kurikugirira utaringirira ntituryamane, kandi umubano ugakomereza kuri rwa rukundo rwa mbere twabonye hejuru.
Muri rusange urukundo ni nkenerwa mubuzima bwacu bwa buri munsi, ni na yo mpamvu abanyamadini barwita itegeko ry’izahabu. Aho urukundo rwabuze niho haza intonganya, amahane, intambara n’ibindi bibi.
Ariko urukundo rwabaho cyangwa rutabaho, abantu dukenera kororoka no kugira umuryango, tukagira abo tubana. Aha ni ho gushyingirwa bihita biza.

KUBANA

Buri muco, buri myizerere, buri gihugu kigira uburyo bwacyo bwo guhuza abifuza kubana.

Benshi babanza gukundana mbere yo kubana, ariko si itegeko cyangwa ihame ko mbere yo kubana mubanza gukundana. Kubana ni igikorwa kiba hagati y’abantu babiri, ubwabo babyemeye, cyangwa imirynago yabo ibyumvikanyeho, nkuko mu mico imwe n’imwe bikimeze, nubwo byo kuri ubu bidashyigikiwe ariko ku ruhande rumwe wanasanga nta cyo byari bitwaye kuko ba sogokuruza bacu babanaga bataranabonana kandi ingo zabo zararambaga. Aha rero wakibaza niba urugo rushinzwe kuko abantu babanje gukundana ari rwo ruramba, rubamo amahoro. Igisubizo na we wacyiha ushingiye kuri za gatanya zigenda ziyongera umunsi ku wundi.

Gusa nanone, bishobora kuba kudahuza impamvu aho umwe ashobora gushaka undi afite indi mpamvu, wawundi we azi ko ari urukundo gusa. Iyo bavuze ko umuntu ari mugari ni cyo baba basobanura. Nshobora kureba kure nkabona ko nimbana nawe ntazigera nsonza, ntazabura icyo nambara. Ngakora uko nshoboye kose tukazabana dore ko bavuga ngo umuntu ananira umuhana ntananira umushuka.

Binashobora kandi kuba gahunda ya Win-Win (UNGUKA NUNGUKE), iri kugenda ifata intera muri iyi minsi. Umukobwa yabona yujuje imyaka nka 40 atarabona umugabo, agatanga isoko ryo gushaka umugabo, akamwemerera ubutunzi runaka undi na we agahembwa kuba umugabo we. Wa musore azaba abonye ikimukiza ubukene umukobwa na we abe abonye umugabo. Nubwo ushobora kumva ko aba bantu batazabana neza ariko waba wibeshye. Kubana neza bituruka ku guhuza imyumvire nta kindi. Ntibivuze ngo mube mukundana gusa, kuko hari n’abakundana imyaka 5, bakabana ariko bamarana imyaka 15 babana bagatandukana.
Ikindi gishobora gutuma umuntu ashaka, ni ugukora imibonano noneho adatinya dore ko iyo uyikoze utarashaka byitwa icyaha, kwica umuco n’ibindi. Si ibyo gusa hanarimo kuba urambiwe abakubaza igihe uzashakira, kuba ubona urungano rwose rwarashatse cyangwa se kuba ubona imyaka iri kugusiga. Ntitwakibagirwa ababana kuko bateye/batewe inda, nuko bakabura andi mahitamo

Rero si itegeko ngo nubona abantu babana wumve ko bakundana, cyangwa ngo niba bakundana bibe ihame ko bazabana. Oya. Hari benshi bakundana bagasazana batabanye nkuko hari n’ababana batarakundanye, ahubwo kubera impamvu imwe cyangwa iyindi. Gukundana ni ikintu ukwacyo, kubana kikaba ikindi, icyakora ntitwasoza tutavuze ko biba akarusho iyo ubanye n’uwo mukundana kandi urwo rukundo rwanyu rukagumaho.